My Best Friend

It's almost 5 months since I last contacted my best friend. Since then, we never talk or even see each other even in msn or yahoo messenger. I do not know why we could really end up like this.... Maybe it's just very wrong for a gay guy to fall in love with his best friend.

At first, I also din expect that I would love someone like him. But the more I hang out with him together with my other housemates, i started to have feelings toward him. When he treats me nicer than his other friends, the more i feel liking him......

Things just don't happen the way I would like it to be at times......I thought I could just take him as my normal friend but I feel scared to lose him. When he started to piss off with me for demanding too much from him and talking bad about me with his friends, i felt damn sad when I found it out. I admit that sumtimes i do demand a lot from him but on the other side, i will never show a no bother face to him whenever he needs me......in studies or watever. Even when i come to work in Singapore, I never complain about calling though i am almost broke......

Now and then, looking back at our pictures....i really hope that i could get back together with him and the rest and perhaps start to take the friendship more lightly...at least it wun come to an extent like this. I really do not wish to lose a best friend just like that......

I am sorry... (if only you can hear me :( ......)
Why you could never understand me or even try to listen to me?
How could I ever tell you about who i really am when i am not sure of myself....?

Hotties

Some of hotties' pics I found.........












Enjoy and happy sharing ^^

Male Circumcision

According to BBC News, the study's findings should eliminate reservations about using the procedure as a method of preventing the spread of HIV (BBC News, 1/7). For the study, Ronald Gray of Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health and colleagues followed 4,456 sexually experienced boys and men ages 15 to 49 in Uganda who were HIV-negative. The researchers randomly assigned 2,210 to be circumcised at the onset of the study, while 2,246 had the procedure delayed for two years. The researchers followed up with both groups at six, 12 and 24 months and compared information on sexual desire, satisfaction and sexual performance. According to Gray, the study was conducted as part of an HIV prevention initiative (Blackwell Publishing release, 1/8). According to the study, there was little difference between the two groups when they were asked about their sexual desire, satisfaction and performance. The study found that 98.4% of circumcised participants reported satisfaction, compared with 99.9% in the control group, and that 98.6% of the circumcised group reported no problems with their ability to penetrate, compared with 99.4% in the control. Marginally more circumcised participants -- 99.4% -- reported that they had no pain during intercourse, compared with 98.8% of men in the control group, the study found. Gray said that the "study clearly shows that being circumcised did not have an adverse effect on the men who underwent the procedure when we compared them with the men who had not yet received surgery." He added, "Other studies already show that being able to reassure men that the procedure won't affect sexual satisfaction or performance makes them much more likely to be circumcised." Some groups have warned against using circumcision as a primary HIV prevention method, BBC News reports. Deborah Jack, chief executive of the National AIDS Trust, said, "There is a fear that people that have been circumcised will feel they are protected when they are not." She added, "Condoms remain the best way of preventing HIV through sexual intercourse." According to Jack, research into HIV transmission and circumcision has been "limited in its scope," and further research into new methods and vaccines still is needed (BBC News, 1/7). John Fitzpatrick of University College Dublin, who also serves as editor of BJU International, said, "We believe that these findings are very important as they can be used to support public health messages that promote circumcision as an effective way of reducing HIV transmission" (Blackwell release, 1/8)
extracted from www.axcest.com article provided by PT Foundation

Addicted to Naruto @@

Hope you enjoy ....!!



The great fight between Gaara and Naruto



Naruto Movie 4 ( not available yet )

Naruto Movie 1: The Snow Princess

One of the few animes that got me addicted. Started during my 1st year in university...thanks to my f***ing housemates. But grateful to him sumhow that I was introduced to such nice animes.

This is the ending theme song for Naruto Movie 1:

I feel tired of walking
The raindrops hit my face
Out here chasing an uncatchable rabbit
I can see deep into your eyes
like the bubbling water in the depths of a dark sea
You're calling out to me, to me...
I'm right here
Where, where should I go...to satisfy these desires?
Let's head home and then, tomorrow
Will you smile and say "everything is all right?"
I call out your name, your name...
I'll give you a warm welcome
Just close your eyes and remember our childhood days


You make up for the area that i am lacking
I've forgotten all about the sad times
So I'm not scared at all
now I've lied and I feel remorse
somehow I manage to grow up
Now I feel ashamed and I nervously sweat
But even still i've found a reason to continue the dance
I search my soul, search my soul...
I'm yelling out to the heavens!
If i just open that door, that door ..... I'll be saved
Let's head home and then
Let's meet that white rabbit on the dark side of the moon
Let's head home and then tomorrow
We'll be laughing on our bare feet
You're calling out to me, to me....
I'll give you a warm embrace
Just close your eyes and remember our childhood days

White Peacock

It is said that whenever you see a white peacock, you will be blessed with good lucks all year long!
So I take this opportunity to showcast the pictures sent to me and wish all of you, a great year ahead and all the best..... muacks!

Enjoy the beautiful peacock....

Annual Dinner

It has been quite a fun and boring night at the Serangoon Country Club, celebrating my company's anniversary .... our very annual dinner. Quite shock to realized that there are just 7 tables with 9-10 people on each. So few huh? And to add more spices to the nite, they invited an Indian who called himself "little darkie"....hahha.....he is not that bad actually, quite humourous and sometimes the sarcastic way of his speech made me laughed all out of my lungs!

Hmm I did not get the few attractive prizes on display but managed to get myself a door gift and a headset. So considering that everyone has both as gifts when attending, it's been a great reward.

After the dinner lasted for 4 and half hours, I left the place with my colleagues and took a cab back with them. I thought I had run out of money and was expecting my colleague who is staying near me to pay first before claiming from company. But he showed me his S$8.....lol. Luckily I still have enough to pay the cab's fare though it officially made me declared bankrupt :)

A self-declared holiday ;p

Work headache?
Hahaha....guess wat. I pretended to be sick today and took a day off. A self-declared holiday for my own.
Went to meet some guys around my place and ....get laid ;p

Dunno what I really want but then I did manage to meet a guy and had great fun!

Time really flies very fast....one day off and it's almost due. Have to get back to work again next morning.....have to meet my kiasu colleagues.

Wish everyone a good nite and take care.... :)

Nice collection #1

Some personal collection of photographs taken from National Geographics......

What does "Fri3ndsHip" really means?

Used to think that good friends are easy to get. Just treat people good and they will treat you good. that somehow just don't work......especially when I am different from the normal guy out there in the neighbourhood. Been going through a few good friendships with my so-called best friends but somehow I just wrecked the whole things up again and again.

They just find me odd by being too good to them and doubting me sexuality.....i do not wish to lie to them but somehow i am just not ready to reveal who i really am. Especially being brought up in a traditional-minded family and Islamic country.....The chinese in me also do not let me have the courage to do that. I do not wish to be treated differently by the people around me...not to mention at my work place where there are so many homophobics and the stories of people who got their lives in ruin after coming out of closet. Just like when I told one of my best friends back then, he feels totally weird to be with me again.

Blogging huh?

Wanted to start blogging after procrastinating for some time....way back when I was in my uni. Been reading some interesting blogs and some just really "moved" me......i just thought "hey, why don't I create one rather than always keep plotting my own stories in my brain!!".

Sometimes I really feel fukking stupid for I will go all my way out just to walk around the cruising areas in Singapore for Ajs for hours without a destination....but an aim I guess. That's just an AJ's life after all rite? Every weekends I will spend my time either going to those hunting grounds trying to catch someone to get a hitch or calling my friends out to meet. And most of the time, I would end up in the sauna with my friends...hunting down our own "foods"!

I used to be the one cursing down the "filthy" people who frequently go to the sauna or bathhouses. However here I am again and again..... Anyway that was 5 years back before I broke up with my first ex. Been out of the "scene" for some time during my 4 years of study in uni back in Malaysia. After opting to work in Singapore, it really opened every door for me to get wild and sometimes, I do wonder do i really who I am now? Sadly to admit that, I keep running away from that question and let the time passes by while enjoying each and every day of mine.

Maybe the problem is perhaps with me like to be alone......that's why easily get bored but if I were to get some friends to hook up with, I may feel weird at times.......